Kokoro wo fukinukeru sora no iro kaoru kaze...

There’s so much hate out there.

Women hating men. Men hating women. Heteros hating queers. Queers hating heteros. Races hating each other. Vanillas hating kinks. Kinks hating vanillas. Different sexualities hating on each other. Different gender identities hating on each other. Who are we? Why are labels so impressed into today’s society? Why is love and acceptance so hard to find? Why can’t we just be who we feel inside and be loud and proud no matter who we are, without having to worry about other people calling us out for who we are? Some day I hope we can all share the same safe space. It’s a future I hope I can raise my kids in.

Ahh

I miss heeeeem
Why must sleepovers only occur on some nights :/

So looking forward to a future full of sleepy cuddling with Mr. Muffin

To anyone who’s curious

So the boy who I’ve been back and forth with for almost 2 years now, after spending a long time apart (mostly my choice, he was being unfaithful and just bringing me down) has decided that he’s ready to commit and he’ll do anything to make me his again. I’m very excited for a future with someone who is willing to bust their ass to earn my trust back. He wrote me a very heartfelt letter and hid it for me to find…. maybe he’ll be the daddy I was wishing for! :3 wish me luck everyone. BTW, hello to my new followers!!!

I just want a Daddy

A real one who’ll only be my Daddy and will focus on me as his only babygirl… who doesn’t change his mind… who’s responsible, strong but gentle, and smart, who protects me and cherishes me over anyone else … and I would be the best girl in the world…. I would give him everything in return and take care of him.

Is that so much to ask?

Can I have some advice?

So. I don’t trust anyone. Neither does my s/o Dylan. I often need reassurance. I get anxiety attacks where i feel like i literally cant stop myself and all i want to do is self-harm. Its horrible. I hate it… but I’m in therapy for my issues. He WAS but decided to stop. Anyway thats just a little backstory.

So we basically know most of the same people. A text came up on his phone from a girl named “Angelica”. I definitely don’t know an Angelica, but it’s not like its a big deal if his buddy texted him. I just asked, “who’s angelica?” As calmly and politely as possible. I definitely did not want a conflict, just hoping for a straight, factual answer and that’s it. Instead he replied,
“No one.”
I persisted because, well… I have anxiety a lot. I panic and always fear the worst. I don’t trust ANYONE because everyone has hurt me. EVERYONE including Dyl. But we can’t choose who we love. Anyway. I believe he’s never cheated on me before but he has gone clubbing behind my back, snuck over his ex-hookups house at night (behind my back) to go “talk to her” cuz “she needed someone to talk to”, and he spent the night with a stripper he used to work with but allegedly didn’t sleep with her, he just gave her a ride home and it was too late for him to go back to his parents house (later than 2 am he can’t come back). These incidents were all in the first year we dated…. it’s been almost 2 years since then. He’s grown up A LOT and doesn’t act like a boy for the most part he is what I would consider a man.

But i think a mature man would look back on his track record and see why I’m so mistrusting, and respect my feelings enough to answer me. He refused.

After I asked a couple times and kept getting the response “no one”, I dropped it. But, later on, he started teasing me about having other boyfriends, and it reminded me of this girl. I was like “oh, i have other boyfriends but you can’t even tell me who angelica is?” He said she was a friend of a friend, but thats extremely vague. Why can’t he just tell me how he knows her? Thats all i wanna know. I didn’t accuse him of cheating. Im just so panicked. he just kept answering “she’s no one”. He was like “im probably never gonna see her or talk to her again.” What does that even mean? Who IS she? I’m so paranoid. But i was respectful the whole time. I hate fighting. I hate anxiety. I hate conflict. Why couldnt he just understand that i was desperate for closure?

Anyway, it ended in him telling me to go fuck myself. And that i ruined the day we had. He’s still ignoring me. What. The fuck. Do i do? My heart is beating out of my chest.

You know you’re intimately close and (maybe overly?) friendly with a guy when

He sends you a ridiculously hilarious picture of his nutsack hanging out of his boxers before he goes to bed.

I laughed so hard xD I love him.
I wish I could post the photo cuz you guys would all cry laughing.